So it’s your fault. And you know it. Everyone around you blames you. You feel terrible. You put it right, as far as you can. The damage is never permanent. The ‘victim’ [your child] learns from it. So do you. And so do those who prefer learning to condemnation.
You let go, you move on.
The only people who want you to spend the rest of your life feeling guilty are doing the same to themselves.
There is nothing of value in continuously beating yourself up. When did any creative solution ever emerge from doom & gloom?
Look around. What are the kids like whose parents are always beating themslves up? Good role models?
Shut down the scapegoat factory, forgive yourself. Set the best example.